Why do men try to dominate or scare women? Is it fun or is it frustration or hatred?
A penchant desire to get even, to settle a score and a feeling that you are not inferior to the person who harmed you.
It was found that those who are motivated to seek power, authority or status are more vengeful. In the Solid Self confidence program i said that people seek the things that they believe they lack and the last thing a power seeker would want to feel is helplessness that's why he might respond aggressively to those who make him feel helpless.
Dear Rumani Dey, I would suggest that the acts of vengeance know no gender. I would suspect that you feel they indeed do based on your specific background as a woman you may well have a fresh history of being grieved. I have compassion for those who have been abused or are being abused.
Researchers suggest vengeance has psychological rewards which perpetuates the attitude. In society which historically given preference to the advantaged making the system unjust by its nature.
If we look at justice of an eye for an eye it constituted an advancement punishment of the disadvantaged and no real law. for the privileged. Reciprocity you been hurt you will be hurt.
The use of Mosaic Laws do not settle a system of vengeance which can perpetuate grievance.
In a theological advancement the cycles of retribution can only be overcome with mercy and love combined with justice. If we can go beyond reprisal action which is called the New Commandment of loving our enemies.
In this approach the idea is not to get even but rather to get over and past grievances which this can only occur by hating the abuse but the loving the abuser.
It might sound easy but in reality it is Very very hard to do and counter intuitive from our rational viewpoint. For this viewpoint to work Love has to triumph over justice.
The sad fact is that abusers abuse and in some way the abuser has been abused. Breaking this cycle depends on not taking reprisal even when in a rational sense it is merited. This can occur but only when mercy triumphs over justice and love provides the environment for healing and restoration.
What is indelibly true is that hurt people hurt people and there are lots of hurt people out there both women and men.
I can't love the abuser though I might get over by finding the root cause of the problem. Then it's easy to forgive the abuser
Without forgiving there is no healing the forgiveness is for the grieved to get over and to heal and not be trapped in the vicious cycle. That does not mean you need to volunteer to stay in the hurt the opposite is true get out get over and get on. Helping people who are in the trap is very good for the whole process as it takes the emphasis away of affliction to overcoming.
But it's a madness according to me. Revenge making you feel better puts you in a cycle of impure guilty mind
That is the craziness! Revenge can be addictive and make you feel stimulated and also let you down. When you get into that internal chemical exposure it puts one into bondage of what you will need to get rid on. It is said that getting into vengeance is like taking poison and expecting the object of your wrath will die. The only way out is love and forgiveness because it stops the deadly cycle which ensnares participants.
The purpose of revenge is to pay someone with the same measure of what he or she did to you. Men don't dominate or scare women out of hatred or for fun. There is no smoke without a fire. There must be a reason??. Not all humans are the same. Some have a soft heart to forgive. Others too without a revenge the blood boiling within will not cool down.
Maybe in paleolithic times revenge was a way of neutralizing a potentially ongoing threat by paying back an injurious action with a similar action as deterrent; the psychology behind it would be self-preservation. Revenge might be seen as the precursor to the forms of community cooperation and judicial mechanisms (rule of law, punishment) that generally came to replace it at least at the societal level. I think there is a large grain of truth in Hobbes's theoretical metaphor of a social contract.
The question title is different from the text .
I don't think revenge is linked to either gender .
Mohamad-Hani Temsah Agreed. Nor are domination and scare tactics necessarily linked to revenge. The question and the underlying text raise different sets of issues.
- Badges
- Science topic
- Similar topics
- Psychology