There are many different kinds of betrayals, can you name one or number of them? what is your opinion of it? Why does one betray? Is s/he obliged to do so, or are there other reasons?
Dear Hazim,
"Good day" !!! (quote)
" They talk of a man betraying his country, his friends, his sweetheart. There must be a moral first. All men betray is his conscience. "
----- JOSEPH CONRAD, Under Western Eyes. 1911
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"If someone betrays you once, it's his fault. If he betrays you twice, it's your fault."
---- (Italian Proverb)
Dear Hazim,
"Good day" !!! (quote)
" They talk of a man betraying his country, his friends, his sweetheart. There must be a moral first. All men betray is his conscience. "
----- JOSEPH CONRAD, Under Western Eyes. 1911
3 - Betrayal and friendship: David Mamet’s American Buffalo
http://universitypublishingonline.org/cambridge/companions/chapter.jsf?bid=CBO9780511999529&cid=CBO9780511999529A006
Different kind of betrayals are treated in this row of articles. More than a thousand!
https://www.researchgate.net/search.Search.html?query=betrayal&type=publication
Betrayal is 'an act of disloyalty that is done deliberately', An act that is a calculated move by one towards other that may bring harm and disrepute to the other - friend, locality, country ..........
Dear Hazim, I agree with @Vibha's point of view. Perhaps there is also one type of betrayal not mentioned yet as self-betrayal. This can mean betrayals of own values, priorities etc.
Dear Mr Tahir ,
I agree with Alam's statement, LACK of morality !!
My opinion-on any scale /level lacks humanity , dignity , integrity and most importantly commitment to the society we live in.
Why do people do that !! I think it is obvious power => $$$$ => power , circle of life !!
OBLIGED - Tough really tough to answer , one needs to be in a situation where there is a reason which is bigger than trivial endeavor. Egs are many, all of them have a justification for betrayal .
On personal level it is for "self- affirmation" , witnessed it myself ...
PS:Yet Mr Tahir , I refused to grow up ,why why should I ???
Dear Beata
I agree with you. Self- betrayal is also there. It shames a person in his own eyes.
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
“There are many kinds of betrayals. There are the small ones: the unkind word, the laughter behind someone's back, the petty lies. And there are the betrayals that break hearts, destroy worlds, and turn the strong, sweet light of day into bitter dust.”
― Gillian Shields, Betrayal
Only yesterday I was no different than them, yet I was saved. I am explaining to you the way of life of a people who say every sort of wicked thing about me because I sacrificed their friendship to gain my own soul. I left the dark paths of their duplicity and turned my eyes toward the light where there is salvation, truth, and justice. They have exiled me now from their society, yet I am content. Mankind only exiles the one whose large spirit rebels against injustice and tyranny. He who does not prefer exile to servility is not free in the true and necessary sense of freedom. ~ Khalil Gibran
Betrayal is the abandoning of a covenant that was established between individuals or within groups, societies or country that was meant to be revered and kept at any cost, and causing a damage to the partner(s). It is a mental process of convincing conscience to get lose and devalue of what the covenant was and valuing more the other alternative which in almost all cases is seen as negative unworthy personality. I assume betrayal is common only in humans and not in any other part of nature.
if you feel a phase of unincommonness with a timebased false value in a situation you cannot communicate to at least even one person. Enlightenment comes partl back with the increase of the opponing true values. In truth this is impossible and another way has to be found to manage untrue situations when they have already been communicated. Emotion is deeply influencing our souls and bodies. Not only a clear body has a clear mind - a clear mind is free of muted information agreable.
regards Georg.
I used to advertise my loyalty and I don't believe there is a single person I loved that I didn't eventually betray. ~ Albert Camus
In my view, betrayal is a serious offense against the trust that a person or group has placed on us. The harm caused by the offender has to be serious if we are talking about "betrayal".
From the word "betrayal," we are apt to think about a person's bad deed against another person. However, betrayal can happen also in one's unconscious part of the mind against the conscious part:
"He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore." —Sigmund Freud (taken from http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/betrayal_2.html)
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
“It's hard to tell who has your back, from who has it long enough just to stab you in it....”
― Nicole Richie
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"I have never known a more vulgar expression of betrayal and deceit."
----- Lucien Bouchard
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"Betrayal is universal for people with no principle."
----- Unknown
A fraudulent intent, however carefully concealed at the outset, will generally, in the end, betray itself.
--- Livy
Dear Hazim Hashim Tahir,
Betrayal - a violation of allegiance to anyone or failure of duty to anyone.
Betrayal is condemned universally by most religions as a sin or violation of a taboo, and condemned the moral and ethical laws of society. Betrayal is most often referred to as the abandonment of a friend in trouble, and treason. Betrayal can both pursue any benefit or not.
Regards, Shafagat
The human race is unimportant. It is the self that must not be betrayed."
"I suppose one could say that Hitler didn't betray his self."
"You are right. He did not. But millions of Germans did betray their selves. That was the tragedy. Not that one man had the courage to be evil. But that millions had not the courage to be good. ~ John Fowles
Many thanks dear @Napoleon for your comprehensive response. Nice response.
A betrayal is a broken agreement, implicit or explicit, that is considered vital to the integrity of a relationship. The capacity of a relationship to recover from a betrayal has a lot to do with the responses, particularly on the part of the betrayer to the situation. The more open and non-defensive they are, the more likely it is that there will be resolution. When both partners are committed to this as an outcome, the likelihood increases exponentially.
Most but not all betrayals and acts of deceit can be healed. While there is no generic template to apply to these situations, there are some guidelines that can facilitate the recovery process:
1. Acknowledge your actions to your partner before, not after they find out. The sooner the better.
2. Get honest. Commit yourself to zero tolerance for dishonesty in your relationship.
3. Address the questions that your partner asks you. Don’t be defensive in response to your partner’s need for information.
4. Listen to their feelings, all of them. Don’t analyze, evaluate, judge, or reason with your partner in regard to any of their feelings.
5. Be patient. Reassure your partner that that they can take as much time as they need to rebuild trust.
6. Take responsibility for your actions. Acknowledge the truth of what you’ve done and avoid any explanations, rationalizations, excuses, or justifications for your behavior.
7. Stay focused on your intention. The work of recovery from a breach of integrity in a committed partnership takes time and effort and can be humbling.
https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/stronger-the-broken-places/201206/betrayal-it-s-not-just-about-infidelity
Dear Hazim, Betrayal is an extraordinary movie starred by first-rate actors Ben Kingsley, Jeremy Irons and Patricia Hodge. It is a peculiar movie: It goes from the end to the beginning of a love affair during which each of the three protagonists betrays the other two, as if taking turns. It is a minute investigation of the concept of betrayal, that even includes betraying oneself, which, in the movie, is the strongest betrayal of all. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0085234/
Kingsley is Irons's publisher, and Irons becomes the lover of Patricia, Kingsley's wife. By moving strictly backward in time, you see how the consequences become the motives, and how the motives betray the egoism, cynicism and lack of responsibility of each character against the other: the commercial breach of trust, the marital breach of trust, the writer's betrayal of his own ideas as a writer.... The script slowly goes toward the beginning of betrayal itself and, starting with the decomposition of the characters in the end —which here is the beginning of the movie— the movie director leads us to the origin of a breach of trust waiting to happen.
I agree with this harrowing and fascinating —and so well written, directed and acted — movie in that betrayal is a breach of the trust of another, but —sadly, and specially— a breach of trust with oneself. Betrayal implies our becoming small, egoist, trivial, almost inhuman. Betrayal corrodes the very fabric of friendship and intimacy.
Betrayal is destructive. The person who betrays and the one betrayed are each destroyed by the force of the betrayal. This might make betrayal impossible to forgive as it irreversibly distorts both the faith and the trust of the betrayed as the character of the person who betrays.
Best regards, Lilliana
Dear Hazim,
The Encyclopedia of Diderot & d'Alembert, Vol. 1 (1751), also equated adultery to theft writing that "adultery is, after homicide, the most punishable of all crimes, because it is the most cruel of all thefts, and an outrage capable of inciting murders and the most deplorable excesses.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adultery
To be counterfeit or unfaithful to someone, apathetic to commitment. Betrayal is a violation or breaking of a trust, contract, or confidence between an individual, group or organization that existed or agreed upon earlier.
Betrayal can take on numerous forms. An individual that commits betrayal is known as a traitor. The act of betrayal can exists on many levels. For example an individual that has betrayed his nation by providing state secrets to a rival nation is said to have committed treason.
Mushtaq Ahmad,
Betrayel is not justified, those who think it is justified try to diminish the effects of their own sins which caused so much sorrow to people around them.
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"The chief internal enemies of any state are those public officials who betray the trust imposed upon them by the people."
-------- Dalton Trumbo
Dear Hazim,
I oppose to blame the victim "If someone betrays you once, it's his fault. If he betrays you twice, it's your fault." The betrayer has learning difficulties in that case, and many men have till they get caught.
Dear Dr. Brenda,
Good Day,
I like your husbands saying, it is like the (Italian Proverb) that I mentioned earlier:
"If someone betrays you once, it's his fault. If he betrays you twice, it's your fault."
Dear Hazim,
Do not pass this stupidity on to the next generation. Usually so called intelligent men are more inclined to betray their wife than those who do not think so much of them selves- . According to the stories I have heard it happens when she is on the maternity ward, when she is at home with his offspring and so on. Do not blame your bad character - your lack of moral and your disengagement from your responsibility to build a good relationship-- on anyone else- or your psychopathology on the other one. Only a coward or psychopath does it. - It takes very little to make and keep the significant other happy, if you take time to really listen to him/her.
Do you believe a man can truly love a woman and constantly betray her?Never mind physically but betray her in his mind,in the very "poetry of his soul".Well,it's not easy but men do it all the time. ~ Mario Puzo
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"8 Types Of Betrayals That Can Be As Damaging As Having An Affair
Here are 8 other ways to betray your partner and your relationship, that you may not realize are just as damaging, if not more than physically cheating on your spouse.
1. Putting your wants and needs above your partners
2. Taking your partner for granted
3. Emotional cheating
4. Not standing up for your partner
5. Lying to your partner — even about stupid things
6. Using your partner’s vulnerability/insecurity against them
7. Distancing yourself emotionally
8. Pressuring your partner to change"....
Please, see the link for more detail...
http://www.lifehack.org/343579/8-types-betrayals-that-can-damaging-having-affair
All these points corroborate having an affair
No need to undermine the serious nature of an affair, there is nothing else to do than to go to the superior representing your faith and repent and to ask the Highest for forgiveness
"Types Of Betrayals That Can Be As Damaging As Having An Affair" very stupid written by someone who needs an excuse.
Disappointments in love, even betrayals and losses, serve the soul at the very moment they seem in life to be tragedies. The soul is partly in time and partly in eternity. We might remember the part that resides in eternity when we feel despair over the part that is in life. ~ Thomas Moore
We as a member of society come across different types of person with different tendency -behavior & also lacking moral code of behavior .It is this different nature of human being we find their environment of the society or so to say even our world under different environment & different action .
It is this attitude of human being that they betrayal even their own kith & kin not only that even if we have to resourced our faith & confidence in our own person or colleague or even sometime even in good friend,we unfortunately come across their strength ,behavior,& action & we at that time feel that our close associated person also behavior in such manner where we find the experience of their betrayal .
This is my personal opinion
No one understands betrayal like the one who has been betrayed. ~ Ken Poirot
Why betray?
1. simply lack of the sense of responsibility. in the first place, if you cannot bear the responsibility, why commit and in the end betray?
e.g. a man who abandoned his wife and 3 children for a new girl in town.
2. identification. if the person feels and thinks he found someone or something else he belong, identity crisis will arise, if the gravity of the initial in-group or partner is strong, betrayal happens when the other in-group or partner is equally strong or even stronger in gravity?
e.g. a kid in school finding a new set of friends.
3. practicality. if a person is offered better future over over love.
e.g. a practical guy would choose wealth over his girlfriend if he is to choose between both. anyway he can find another girl to marry when he is already rich. or find the same girl again if she will still be free.
4. choice between 2 evil. if you are being held hostage and you are asked to choose or both will suffer.
e.g. betray your country or betray your wife.
5. choose between 2 good. if you have 2 choices left in a life and death situation.
e.g. if you are in a sinking boat and you can only save either your sister or your girlfriend, who both loves you so much and are both wanting you to save them. surely one will feel betrayed.
In conclusion, betrayal happens because there is an alternative present. There are always humane ways to handle these situations, but when the person's self-esteem is low, control is externally locus, emotionally dire, or his/her personality is just weak, surely s/he will turn to betrayal.
Therefore, betrayal is for the weak and dumb. The strong and the wise will always avoid betrayal. and if choices are limited by circumstances, the strong and the wise never lose hope and faith if not in himself/herself, to the people s/he holds dear, and if not, for the future generation. =)
True, it is like explaining
if someone murders you it is his fault, if you raise from the dead it is your fault
“Everyone suffers at least one bad betrayal in their lifetime. It’s what unites us. The trick is not to let it destroy your trust in others when that happens. Don’t let them take that from you.” ― Sherrilyn Kenyon
When a father betrays his daughter by raping her over and over again for years - according to the presently demonstrated logic- it would be the daughter's fault. Check Joyce Meyer's testimony on Youtube:
http://mystory.me/story/joyce/
"The thorn from the bush one has planted, nourished and pruned pricks more deeply and draws more blood". -- Maya Angelou
Of course, when you fall out of love, it’s rarely about just one failure or one betrayal, is it? . . .
How does it happen? All those things you once loved about each other are replaced by other things that remind you of something you hate until you’re always setting each other off, and what you share is a battleground. In the end, the failure turns out to be less about sex—which surprises most men—and more about loss of respect. One morning your partner looks at you across the bed and wonders at the waywardness of her own heart—how, she asks herself, can she feel such disdain for someone she once felt such love? ~ Frederick Weisel
Dear Fateh,
It does not necessary have to do with feelings or love at all. When a child is very very sick or about to die or is born with special needs - according to my observations relative to leukemia - the father chickens out and leave all the problems + no money to the mother. He silently prepares himself with a backup woman till the new victim gets caught in his yarn.
Suppose we had agreed upon an absolute definition of 'betrayal'. While all of you were offline, I gave a new definition of betrayal. That is an example of betrayal.
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
“Everyone suffers at least one bad betrayal in their lifetime. It’s what unites us. The trick is not to let it destroy your trust in others when that happens. Don’t let them take that from you.”
― Sherrilyn Kenyon, Invincible
Dear Colleagues,
betrayal
1. putting loyalty in someone, and them turning theirs on you.
2. friends stabbing you in the back.
3. the most hurtful thing anyone can do
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=betrayal
The kind of betrayal found practically in very country - politicians betraying their electorate after the elections!
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"We have to distrust each other. It is our only defense against betrayal."
---- Tennessee Williams
PS. even though I don't believe on that !!!
There comes a time when silence is the worse betrayal - Martin Luther King
He felt at once betrayed and betrayer, deceived and deceiver. He was a criminal forced into crime, an unwilling whore. ~ Peter Benchley
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise, and trading on your integrity and not having dignity in life. That's really where failure comes."
------ Tom Cochrane
"Treason is a green and fresh mold, such as down: she eats silently and from within". - Francis Blanche -
Arab proverb "This is the confidence born of betrayal."
I suggest that all those who betrayed their spouse now take part in this discussion and speak up.
Tell us the benefits and consequences for the spouse, children and relatives - both emotional and economic - of the betrayal.
Benedict Arnold, one of the heroes of the Battle of Saratoga (considered by many the turning point of the American Revolution) subsequently when in charge of West Point attempted to sell secrets to the British, forcing him to flee to Canada.
in Canada, he was considered a Loyalist, while in the colonies and later in the USA his name became synonymous with traitor.
while this does not shed light on why one spouse betrays another, it is perhaps relevant to larger questions re: betrayal.
Article Benedict Arnold: Patriot and Traitor
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"They talk of a man betraying his country, his friends, his sweetheart. There must be a moral bond first. All a man can betray is his conscience."
----- Joseph Conrad
Betrayal is abusing the trust that a person has granted you. Betrayal is doing something secretly. There are different reasons to betray some of which are as follow: 1) fear 2) greed and 3) dishonesty.
Those moments when we learn that mothers rage and fathers kill, that friends betray and authority is fallible, or that our own blank, innocent ignorance can destroy the pure, the good, and the loved are moments the very memory of which constitutes the beginning of a strategy to live in a world where such horrors exist. ~ Samuel R. Delany
"One of my main regrets in life was giving considerable attention to inconsiderable people"J.Kintz.Very often a countrry, friends, colleagues, beloved can betray you. Iuda is the eternal symbol of all ages, of all folks.Love, Peace, Good were betrayed from the moment of the world's creation.For 33 pieces of silver. Betrayal once is loss of trust forever.
Self-betrayal occurs when we do to another what we sense we should not do or don't do what we sense we should. Thus self-betrayal is a sort of moral self-compromise, a violation of our own personal sense of how we ought to be and what we ought to do. ~ C. T. Warner
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"For me, I always wonder what's worse: an emotional betrayal or a physical betrayal? That's a really tough call."
----- Hilarie Burton
Betrayal is abusing another person's trust, time, effort, ideas, sense of style, work, body, sexuality, love, money, loyalty, womb for own offspring, copying research, leaving the nest for selfish reasons, pretending good feelings for someone. Betrayal is also not to put in any effort in a relationship. Betrayal can happen out of sadism, psychopathology or shear evilness. However every sin out of our weak flesh and bad character is going to be forgiven when we face the last judgement, except the betrayal of abandoning God. Jesus Christ is our defender.
B. Ewalds-Kvist 2016
When a person tries to betrayal somebody, he deceives himself, making others as well as himself into an abandoned situation.
Dear Khan Muhammad,
I understand that our belief systems diverge at this point. The Trinity in the Christianity is of course a stepping stone for many. To be One and Three at the same time. However, the Son defends us - who believe so - before the Father. The Holy Goast is the third part in the Trinity. Our God is love, so through love we are saved, through the blood of Jesus Christ not through our actions and our own righteousness and deeds. This is difficult and I did not study theology. Pure divine love and mercy save, not the deeds. However good deeds follow a profound devotion.
Betrayal is the violation of our trust and unfortunately, it never comes from our enemies.
Dear Khan,
I do not understand the language and I am not interested in which religion is the only right one. My point is that betrayal is a sin (SIN = something that separates us from God) but as other sins it can be forgiven if the offender properly repents and goes to his/her religious authority. You do not have to convert yourself into my belief system.
Dear Emina,
This is such a long discussion and it goes besides the topic " what is betrayal" so I am not willing to put my time on that now. I am sure that here are many persons who could guide you on the points you mentioned. We are though not here as missionaries?
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"He who betrays you is not one from far away."
----- (African Proverb)
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"When you betray somebody else, you also betray yourself."
----- Isaac Bashevis Singer
Dear @Abhishek, please, do cite the text properly, as your contribution appears to be pure plagiarism.
"A secular definition of betrayal is a violation or breaking of a trust, contract, or confidence between an individual, group or organization that someone or others place in a person, group or organization which is a total break from what was agreed upon earlier by both parties."
http://www.patheos.com/blogs/christiancrier/2015/05/21/what-does-betrayal-mean-a-biblical-definition-of-betrayal/
Why does one betray?
Agreed with previous scholars' definitions & explanations on "betrayal". One of the reasons why a person betrays other(s) is for self-centered gain at the expense of other(s) even though the betrayal act was forced to commit due to someone / something dear to the betrayer was at stake.
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
"The chief internal enemies of any state are those public officials who betray the trust imposed upon them by the people."
----- Dalton Trumbo
"He that has eyes to see and ears to hear may convince himself that no mortal can keep a secret. If his lips are silent, he chatters with his fingertips; betrayal oozes out of him at every pore." - Sigmund Freud
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
The betrayal of trust carries a heavy taboo.
----- Aldrich Ames
Dear Colleagues,
Good Day,
Tragedy in life normally comes with betrayal and compromise, and trading on your integrity and not having dignity in life. That's really where failure comes.
----- Tom Cochrane
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