We prepared Fe-based magnetic nanoparticles by wet grinding using a Retsch PM 200 planetary mill. As a surfactant we used a water-based solution and sodium oleate.
I think sodium oleate dissolve in water, so you can wash your particles several times by D.W. Here oxidation problem is present. Ether or methanol are good candidates.
It is true that sodium oleate is soluble in water, but there is still a layer of a few nanometers on the surface of the nanoparticle and this causes agglomeration. If I use Methanol for example, I am afraid that powders could be toxic for my compatibility applications.