The fear of what other people thought usually trapped the person. How to get rid of this fear?
Why we fear of what other people think?
Possible reason being we might emphasize too much on how other people perceive us / react to our action / inaction e.g. some of our do's, don'ts, mistake that we'd made etc. Usually when we'd lost our confidence, we will lose focus on ourselves on what we can do / should do - instead we turn our focus on how people perceive us.
The fear of what other people thought usually trapped the person. So, is it possible to get rid of this fear?
To get rid of this trap / fear, we should have confidence in ourselves, do the right things etc. & don't rely on other people's expression / reaction as yardstick to measure whether we are doing the right thing.
I think the answer lies in humans being a social animal and in evolutionary terms we are hard wired to live in groups. For thousands of years, humans lived in groups as there was no scientific advancement and living in group was the best option for survival in jungles. An individual's survival depended on following the norms of the group. Therefore, being accepted and appreciated by the group has been our primary concern. So, even in modern world where we can live independently, we still carry our evolutionary hard wiring of being accepted and appreciated by others. So, we care about what others think of us.
Allow me to set my convictions by one of my quotes on the fear of what others think.
"The concern is a reflection of our own inner reproach"
"L’inquiétude est le reflet de nos propres reproches intérieurs"
I think many people can get rid of this fear after the age of 40. Because as long as we are young, we are afraid of being negatively judged.
I think one way to get rid of this fear may be doing your best to do whatever you think is right, no matter what the consequences are and ignore what people think of you.
Dear Shahnaz,
Why we fear of what other people think?
1. Inferiority Complex
- We do not have the courage to do something for fear others would judge us badly especially. Therefore we entertain ourselves with such thoughts.
2. Culture
- Perhaps we are brought up by the custom whereby we ought to fear what other people think everytime we try to contemplate on doing or not doing something. This usually happens in collectivism society whereby all actions are shared at least with an elder or few elders. Doing things alone is not acceptable to some, if not all.
3. Image
- The fear of others destroying your image over something that you might want or do not want to do.
Overcoming such fears
There are ways to do so -
1. Understand what is your fear about.
- is the fear about you trying to do any damage (s) to yourself, your family, society or government?
* if so, you ought to dispel them and change the fear to positive action(s) by thinking about doing the good things for yourself and your significant others
2. Make known your intention(s)
- is the fear about doing something abnormal within the society context?
* Let the elders be known of your intention (s). Listen to their advice and tread it carefully but confidently.
3. Is your fear about something legal or illegal?
- if it is illegal, naturally you have to fear what others would think about you and your actions.
* if it is legal, just go ahead with your plan, know the law and create that glass shield that nobody could ever break.
Fear is natural. Unfounded fear is one that should not even be brought to mind because it does not only entrap the person mentally but physically too.
Best regards - Mariam
We are all social human beings we have to maintain a image of ourself while living in a society. I think it is the only reason of fear.
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