I am exploring the unacknowledged trauma (Nancy Newton Verrier's "primal wound") and resulting disenfranchised grief experienced by adoptees who were adopted in infancy. This trauma is widely acknowledged by adoptees who search for their birth families and by many adoptees in Facebook and other online and in-person groups of adoptees. Infants adopted into good families who meet their needs are often expected to just be grateful for the homes they have and not htink about birth parents they never had a post-birth relationship with or memory of. It is my contention that sealed records exacerbate this trauma and should be abolished. Further we need to provide informed therapy both to acknowledge the loss and provide ways to process the pre-verbal, pre-cognitive separation from birth mothers.