Do people believe that obligation is aversive as Gouldner (1960) claimed or do some people prefer benevolent gratitude?
Hi Mary,
I have absolutely no expertise in this area; however, I am rich on personal experience with other cultures from traveling, working, and living in various countries. I think you should look into the Japanese gift-giving culture which I am sure has a deeply rooted notion of reciprocity engrained within it. When our son, Sven, visited Japan the first time ( he lived there for 3 different summers), it was through our local Rotary Club which has sponsored exchange programs with Japan for many years. The Rotary Club held a special session on the practice of gift giving in Japan early in the local orientation program, emphasizing the "series of gifts" expected with particular attention to the ordering in terms of costliness. By the time our son went for his second trip to Japan, he was so expert at the custom that he had stashed away interesting gifts throughout the year prior to his trip in order to have a "good series" of gifts.
Also, we had two Japanese exchange students stay with us as part of the Rotary Exchange Program, and I received a series of gifts during their short 3-week stay with us. In short, Mary, I think you will benefit by looking at this unique aspect of Japanese culture.
Gwen
Thanks that's great advice. In your experience, do both the guest and host exchange gifts? What is a good gift? Is it different when both are Japanese?
See Deb, Xiaoying, & my obligation paper: "Brother can you spare some time, or a dime": Time and money obligations in the U.S. and China. Jurnal of Cross-cultural Psychology, 43, 592-613. It's on Researchgate.
Ed
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