The question itself implies, at best, a tiresome bias against the baser sex and at worst, an alarming disempowerment of women themselves. It's like saying only men want sex and women have no say in the matter, which is complete nonsense. Indeed, we have the Hite Report (1976) and the Kinsey Report (1948) which clearly tell us otherwise.

--Ah, but let us not beat a proverbial dead horse and get to the fine print of your question, which appears to be more of a comment from Ellwood-Clayton (2013). Certainly, the point is well-taken. However, after reading the entire article, "10 Things You Need to Know about Female Sexuality" in the Huffington Post, I am mystified that few researchers, with the exception of Welling et al. (2007), are truly asking what women actually want. To put it another way, low female sex desire, often called hypoactive sexual desire disorder (HSDD), IS A PROBLEM IF THE WOMAN HERSELF CONSIDERS IT TO BE A PROBLEM.

If you know any women who might be willing to comment on the subject, please ask them to contact me. It is difficult to agree with your view when it is only men who comment explicitly on sexual pleasure and women who remain silent. My conclusions are based on more than 20 years of research. I have read Kinsey and Hite. They concluded that women orgasm most readily through masturbation alone. Perhaps you need to revisit their conclusions?

Ah! It appears you're already answering your own question: "[I]t is only men who comment explicitly on sexual pleasure and women who remain silent... [W]omen orgasm most readily through masturbation alone."

We don't need high-octane researchers like Chadwick et al. (2017) to tell us that multiple societies program women to be "shy in bed" while men are expected to be Casanovas, when everyone from Marriage-dot-Com (2024) to Dr. Psych Mom (2020) comments on the matter.

For countless generations both sexes, at least in the "West," have been trapped in societal cages and modern times call for new approaches (or at least ought to). Legitimate anthropological, sociological, and psychological inquiry mandates that we scrutinize unjust, inequitable cultural norms and, where appropriate, challenge them for balanced, positive change!

It is not society or culture that makes men and women the way they are. It is biology. Orgasm is a vital characteristic of male reproductive function. Male orgasm triggers ejaculation of sperm. Female orgasm has nothing to do with reproduction or with intercourse. Women are able to be much more considered (in theory) about who they mate with. A one-night stand is useless to a woman. She wants a supportive, affectionate relationship and is willing to offer intercourse to get it.

So that would imply that lesbians don't have sex?

Lesbians engage in tribbing, which is similar to intercourse but without any penetration by a penis. Two women just rub their vulvas against each other. So it you call that sex, then lesbians have sex. But they prefer upper-body lovemaking (just as heterosexual women do) - kissing and caressing - because their focus is on emotional feelings and they are not erotically aroused with a lover. So genital stimulation does not make sense.

...and there's no such thing as strap-ons or dildos?

Would you have an orgasm by strapping on a fake penis or using a dildo? Lesbians tell me that they rarely use penetration. Kinsey also concluded the same. Equally very few women ever masturbate by using penetration. Those who do are typically inexperienced or have taken advice from a man. Men cause untold confusion by telling women that penetration is equally pleasurably for a woman. Most heterosexual men never offer to be the receiver of a penis or a dildo. So they assume that the vagina has some magical properties that make it respond differently to the mouth or the anus. Having a man ejaculate into a body orifice does not cause arousal or orgasm.

A distressingly negative, misandrist, and dismissive tone runs through this inquiry, especially when modern electronic sources are rife with FEMALE researchers making credible claims contradicting yours. Shan Boodram and Dr. Jenn Kennedy come to mind. And of course we have the good old classic, Dr. Ruth Westheimer, who has been in practice for over fifty years. A rising star in the field is Dr. Rena Malik, an M.D. who not only specializes in such stuff but also has her own YouTube channel, where she frequently answers questions such as yours.

I suggest you take your male views elsewhere. The only view of sex that sells is the male perspective. I am presenting the female view because I don't need to make money from what I am concluding. If you know any women (unpaid) who are willing to discuss sex and orgasm, please ask them to contact me. In over 20 years of talking about sexuality, most women refuse to comment. But men always think they have the right to speak on women's behalf. This is politics rather than science. Any women who tells men what they want to hear is guaranteed of success. I am talking about the millions of silent women in the general population. You and your pals cannot explain the silence or anything that you are suggesting is commonplace. For example, what erotic turn-ons cause female arousal? Women are talking about emotional rewards with a lover. Men and women are talking at cross purposes. Using the words arousal and orgasm to mean different sensations is meaningless. I am talking about sexual response.

Please bear in mind that you were the one who came to this coeducational forum asking biased, bitter, misandrist questions. Please also note that you were given plenty of female-led research (above) and persist with what the Carmelite nuns call invincible ignorance. The only unpaid woman I know of who might be willing to enlighten you is Chloe Sunderland, but you will have to contact her yourself. In the meantime, you might consider googling "misandrist forums" and taking the childish, hate-filled "research questions" where they would be better received, as Research Gate was primarily designed for serious, open-minded scholarship.

If female orgasm were common in the population, every woman would be an orgasm expert. You wouldn't need to pay women to talk about sex and orgasm. Also men might know what erotic turn-ons, anatomy and stimulation technique women use to reach orgasm. Don't you have a partner you could ask? Are you gay?

I've lost track a bit of which answer relates to which question, but the g-spot is definitely a thing. I do realise that simple, selfish penile penetration is unlikely to stimulate that in most women, but there are plenty of penetrative toys designed to do so.

I certainly wouldn't deny that many women have low libidos, especially at younger ages, or that many struggle to reach orgasm, but neither of those factors suggest that female sexuality is a male fantasy.

I'd also agree that the male perspective of sex 'sells' better, but I didn't realise we were talking about commercial viability. There is a growing scene for pornography made by women, for women, and especially queer erotica produced by women for women, but yes, that is a smaller market than male sexuality. Most female produced/targetted erotica is framed as 'steamy romance', which is indeed more relationship based, but no less erotic. Whether it's Jilly Cooper or 50 Shades, female erotica is a thing.

The most obvious problem with this thesis though, is that it undermines decades of feminist theory, returning us to a patriachal view of sexuality that relieves men of having to worry about female satisfaction. This was an obvious lie when men claimed that female sex-drive was a psychiatric disorder, and is just as obviously false when a woman says it.

If we listen to what women *are* saying in all forms of media, it's not that they want less sex - it's that they want *better* sex. It's easy to not be bothered about sex if your only experience is bad sex, which, unfortunately, is a fairly common experience for women.

I'm really sorry but you are male. Would you think it appropriate for women to define your sexuality? Even scientists have finally accepted that the G-spot is a myth. There was very little evidence for it. They use tiny samples to make generalisations about the whole population. The idea that intercourse can cause female orgasm is illogical. No one, not even a man, can orgasm from stimulation that they do not control. Could you orgasm from stimulation that lasts 2 minutes on one occasion, then 1m 56secs the next, then 2m 3 secs the next? The stimulation of intercourse only lasts for as long as a man has an erection i.e. until he ejaculates. So all the discussion of possible female anatomy is a waste of time. Only the penetrating male pays for sex. The receiver of intercourse (male or female) is paid for providing the pleasure that the penetrating male enjoys. I appreciate your engagement on this topic but you need to read less erotic fiction and more research findings. I recommend Kinsey and Hite. They were explicit about female orgasm.

OK, that is so full of bizarre assumptions and projection that I'll respectfully bow out. I do agree that it would be more useful for you to have female engagement, especially on that last post. I shall watch the debate with interest.

Thanks Richard for your interest in my work. Women are typically silent on sexual topics. I think that speaks for itself...

So, I'm an AFAB non-binary person, and a lesbian. Is my opinion sufficiently valid for you?

From a sociological standpoint, I'd say that you really need to go back and take a closer look at your personal biases and assumptions about how sex and sexuality work both mentally and physically and the importance of cultural norms in shaping people's self-conceptions and physicality. You could do worse than take a crash course in Queer Theory.

You might also consider that women are frequently under-represented in research (both the doing and the participating) due to socio-economic, political, and cultural issues that may make them less available than men and frequently makes research by and about them less able to receive funding.

Interestingly, these are often similar reasons why women may end up with unsatisfactory sex lives.

You appear to think that women don't talk freely about sex or want good sex, or even any sex. I would respectfully suggest that you've not been interacting with a broad enough cross-section of women.

Alternatively, you've started from the perspective that women should have low-libidos and should not enjoy sex and are going to refuse to believe any evidence to the contrary. Somehow, I get the feeling that you'd also try and shame any woman who admitted to frequent orgasms, a strong libido, and a satisfying sex life because it would be too challenging to your position.

As for your complete lack of understanding of lesbians and our sexual practices... I don't even know where to start!

I post sexual content every day focusing on female sexuality. I have done so for years and invited women to comment. Typically only men comment. If you were born a man, someone who has a penis, then your brain is male. You cannot change your birth sex. I have not found lesbians to be any more familiar with sexual response or willing to talk about sexuality than other women. I am not talking about whether women enjoy sex. They clearly do despite all the pressure on them to say that they do. I am talking about sexual response, arousal and orgasm. Women cannot explain the erotic turn-ons involved, the specific anatomy and the stimulation technique. Clearly they are not having orgasms. One lesbian has talked to me but she has explained that lesbians focus on lovemaking just as heterosexual women do. They do not use penetration and they use cunnilingus, a sensual pleasure, seldom. Responsiveness is defined by sex and has nothing to do with orientation.