Hi,

I assume this is something that happens often.

I never was in this situation, but maybe you know someone who is easier to deal with and who is at the same social level like your difficult graduate advisor. You could aks him to be kind of a mediator. I think this could help for short.

But if you need do deal with this person for a long time period you need to establish a lasting communication with him or her.

Maybe your graduate advisor is a difficult person because it isn't very empathetic or it can't put oneself in your position.

Try to find out, what others think about this advisor. Connect with people who have similiar opinions.

If you are not allone with your opinion then try to persue someone else to speak for you, maybe someone in a more leading position, someone who is nice and more open minded.

If you are allone with your opinion then maybe you should reconsider your stand or you have to talk to your advisor by yourself about the things that in genral bother you.

No matter what way, speaking about problems and concerns is the only way to eliminate them.

I hope I gave you some ideas that will work for you.

best greetings.

How should a graduate student behave if his adviser is difficult? This is more of a rhetorical question if you think about your education as an investment. Though it is a simple thing to request a new advisement officer, odds are you haven't put your interpersonal communication skills to use. In fact, in order to be successful in the 21st century workplace, even if it is an R&D environment, social convention requires you have strong emotional intelligence capabilities to manage and sustain the global relationships of tomorrow.

In short, if any advisory counsel is not to par, you need to think wisely and get yourself into a better situation.

T.T. Michael Berhane The question is simple. There are two parties involved a graduate student and a difficult advisor. Communication skills are important but the question doesn't raise any communication problem from the student side. It says the problem is from the advisor side. One can ask in a different question that "how should a professor behave if his/her graduate student is difficult?" IMO it is better to understand the question before putting your thoughts into it.

Maybe this person is just not cut out for a traditional Graduate School education. Good Luck. Best,T.T.

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This is likely not the best way to get answers due to limitations and sources. I was about to ask for you to clarify, felt bad for the hostility and assumptions but paused. Glad I did as, DID find some great responses for you on the old Google and learned some things myself too. No snarkiness either! Google this: "if your graduate advisor is not helpful" Read the first three sets and good luck. I did find this wonderful link but more for me than you:

I simply do not understand how an advisor could be difficult, probably because I did not have one. Four things come readily to mind. i. He just does not like you. ii. He does not like what you are doing. iii. He is not versed in what you are doing, meaning that he does not have a good grasp of the research subject, so he covers up with antagonism and makes himself unapproachable. iv. Maybe you are the problem and are making yourself un-advisable. You don't respect laboratory times, you don't take instructions, you don't attend to the things that make advising enjoyable. I have heard all these but never experienced any of them maybe because my supervisor chose me. Now what should you do? Big question! First identify the reason for your advisor's difficult nature and then see how to go about addressing it. The nature of solution will depend on the reason for the problem. You have to have some character dear. It's a graduate programme.

@Maurice... " i. He just does not like you. ii. He does not like what you are doing."

These is a waste of public money to give funds to professors who operate based on "likes" and "dislikes". The relationship should be research and deliverables, not "lord and prostitute type". I have seen, anyway, professors with likeable prostitutes who deliver not research outputs.

"iii. He is not versed in what you are doing, meaning that he does not have a good grasp of the research subject, so he covers up with antagonism and makes himself unapproachable."

This always happens when the professor thinks he is absolutely superior. Nobody knows everything and learning-teaching should go both ways. Sometimes students are smarter and should teach their professors.

" iv. Maybe you are the problem and are making yourself un-advisable. You don't respect laboratory times, you don't take instructions, you don't attend to the things that make advising enjoyable"

The question was about difficult professor not about difficult student.

"You have to have some character dear. It's a graduate programme."

Completely wrong conclusion. The question elaborates about the difficult nature of the professor not the student. The student tried different techniques to convince the professor. So, a little reading of the question may help.