A better question: Why do some people use RG as their personal blog?

These questions are meant for women and those who research sexuality. You are free to go elsewhere. Scientists need to be curious - that involves asking questions. You don't want to ask questions because the status quo suits men. Sexual ignorance is never a good thing. I am educating the adult population and getting people to think about the myths that are believed like gospel.

The idea that a woman might feel obligated to offer regular intercourse to a man, as in the example you mentioned, touches on several complex issues, including societal, cultural, and relational dynamics. These dynamics can involve:

1. Gender Roles and Expectations: Historically, traditional gender roles have often associated men with being financial providers and women with managing domestic responsibilities, which could extend to expectations around sex. The notion of "owing" sex can stem from these roles, where financial support from a man is seen as something that should be reciprocated in other ways, such as through physical intimacy.

2. Cultural Conditioning: Some women may feel pressure from cultural or social norms that suggest a wife has a duty to meet her husband's sexual needs. This idea can be reinforced by messages from family, media, or religious teachings about a woman’s role in a marriage.

3. Power Dynamics: If one partner holds more power in certain areas of the relationship (e.g., financial), the other might feel indebted or obligated. In the quote you shared, the woman's sense of obligation is tied to her husband's role as the provider, which implies a power imbalance in their relationship.

4. Emotional and Relational Factors: Some women may feel that sexual intimacy is part of maintaining emotional closeness or fulfilling their partner's expectations, even if it does not align with their personal desires at the moment. This can reflect a desire to maintain harmony in the relationship or avoid conflict.

Shere Hite, in her research on female sexuality, highlighted that many women felt conflicted about sex due to social expectations and a lack of open communication about their own desires and needs. These issues reflect deeper societal patterns around gender and power, rather than being about individual relationships alone.

Understanding these dynamics requires a nuanced perspective on gender, sexuality, and relationship expectations.

The concept of women feeling obligated to offer regular intercourse to men, particularly within marital relationships, can be understood through various psychological, sociocultural, and relational frameworks. Gendered power dynamics play a central role, where traditional gender roles position men as providers and women as caregivers, often leading to implicit or explicit expectations around sexual availability. These dynamics are reinforced by societal norms that have historically supported male dominance and control over financial and sexual resources, which can create pressure for women to reciprocate through sexual intimacy (Decker et al., 2021).

Research indicates that these power asymmetries, especially in relationships where economic dependency exists, can lead to situations where women feel obligated to fulfill their partner's sexual desires. This obligation is often tied to transactional dynamics, where sex becomes an unspoken exchange for financial or emotional stability (Decker et al., 2021; Zhu & Chang, 2019). Furthermore, studies have shown that gender inequality and controlling behaviors in intimate relationships are strongly correlated with the perpetuation of intimate partner violence (IPV), underscoring the broader societal forces that reinforce these expectations (PLOS ONE, 2021).

Additionally, life history theory offers insight into how reproductive and survival strategies have historically influenced gender roles. In high-risk environments, traditional gender roles—where men are providers and women are caretakers—may have been adaptive. However, in modern societies, such roles can perpetuate inequalities, making women feel compelled to adhere to outdated expectations, including the notion that sex is owed as part of their role in a marital relationship (Zhu & Chang, 2019).

References

Decker, M. R., Wood, S. N., Thiongo, M., McLane, N., Byrne, M. E., Devoto, B., ... & Burke, V. M. (2021). Gendered power dynamics and threats to sexual and reproductive autonomy among adolescent girls and young adult women: A cross-sectional survey in three urban settings. PLOS ONE, 16(5), e0249780.

PLOS ONE. (2021). Gender, power, and violence: A systematic review of measures and their association with male perpetration of IPV. PLOS ONE, 16(10), e0207091.

Zhu, N., & Chang, L. (2019). Evolved but not fixed: A life history account of gender roles and gender inequality. Frontiers in Psychology, 10, 1709. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.01709

Thanks Erin for commenting. The answer for women's obligation is simple. It's a two-way street. Men provide the protection and support. Women repay them by offering regular intercourse. It has been so since time began. The sexes have a symbiotic relationship with each providing for the other's needs. Men need regular sex and women need support to raise a family. These are the basic reproductive goals of the sexes.

Erin E. Fry "Furthermore, studies have shown that gender inequality and controlling behaviors in intimate relationships are strongly correlated with the perpetuation of intimate partner violence (IPV), underscoring the broader societal forces that reinforce these expectations (PLOS ONE, 2021)."

This is misleading given that roughly half of intimate partner violence is reciprocal IPV (Whitaker et al., 2007, American Journal of Public Health) - that is, the violence is perpetrated by both partners.

Second, in cases of heterosexual partner violence women more likely to initiate IPV than men (Archer, 2000, Psychological Bulletin).

Third, the proportion of intimate partner violence is consistently higher among lesbian couples (i.e., no man present) than for women in heterosexual relationships (see attached CDC reports).

"These questions are meant for women" - I see, men aren't allowed to discuss these matters. A major step towards gender equality.

I think men should be able to comment...I just read the answer after my comment from the person who posed the question, and unless I am reading it incorrectly, it seems extremely negative towards men...I do not want to be associated with that.

Erin E. Fry Yes, Jane has a history on RG of misandry and derogatory statements about men. Myself and others have tried (unsuccessfully) to point this out, but to no avail. See the thread below for an example:

https://www.researchgate.net/post/Why_do_men_insist_that_everyone_has_a_sex_drive_experiences_orgasm_with_a_lover2

I appreciate that you actually presented research in support of your claims, unlike Jane, and I agree with much of what you mentioned above.

@blaintomkins wow. The fact that she is claiming research shows only men have sexual drive etc...this is so untrue and I can vouch lol from my own experience...also noticing the answer about only women have sexual intercourse to have their needs met, not true. Wow.

Sex drive operates regardless of any relationship. Do you pursue strange men to obtain intercourse based purely on looks? Sex drive also operates regardless of any contraception. Do you have intercourse regardless of having reliable contraception? Sex drive is a biological and significant urge to engage in intercourse regardless of circumstances. This urge arises in the male brain. No one can have an urge to be penetrated by a penis or other object. This explains why only the penetrating male pays for sex. The receiver (male or female) wants compensation for offering a man the pleasure of penetration. Please take your ignorance and naivety elsewhere. I provide sex education for adults.

The comment you provided raises several issues that may be viewed as problematic, particularly in terms of gender bias and misrepresentation of sexual behavior. Whether or not it qualifies as "misandrist" depends on a deeper exploration of its content, as well as the context in which you expressed it, I would say it is biased and bordering on misandry. I don't see myself as ignorant or naive at all, but knowledgeable about gender differences, women’s sexuality, men's sexuality, as well as up to date with the times. However, it seems more relevant to explore the comment's implications of gendered assumptions about sex, objectification, and the biological drives of different genders.

Below is an analysis of the potential issues with your comment, supported by academic literature:

1. Sexual Desire as a Complex, Multidimensional Construct

The statement that "sex drive is a biological and significant urge to engage in intercourse regardless of circumstances" is an oversimplification of human sexuality. Research shows that sexual desire is a complex construct, influenced by biological, psychological, and sociocultural factors. Both men and women experience sexual desire, but the expression and experience of this desire vary greatly depending on personal, relational, and contextual factors (Regan & Berscheid, 1999; Baumeister et al., 2001). The reduction of sex drive to purely biological terms fails to acknowledge the psychological and emotional dimensions of human sexuality.

Reference:

Baumeister, R. F., Catanese, K. R., & Vohs, K. D. (2001). Is there a gender difference in strength of sex drive? Theoretical views, conceptual distinctions, and a review of relevant evidence. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 5(3), 242-273.

Regan, P. C., & Berscheid, E. (1999). Lust: What we know about human sexual desire. Sage Publications.

2. Gendered Assumptions and the Objectification of Women

The claim that “only the penetrating male pays for sex” and “the receiver (male or female) wants compensation” implies that sexual interactions are inherently transactional and diminishes the role of women or receiving partners in the sexual act. This reinforces gendered assumptions about sex, in which men are seen as active initiators of sex and women (or other receiving partners) as passive, commodified objects. This view reflects outdated and objectifying perspectives on gender and sexuality. Research in feminist theory and gender studies has critiqued such views as perpetuating the objectification and dehumanization of women (Fredrickson & Roberts, 1997).

Reference:

Fredrickson, B. L., & Roberts, T.-A. (1997). Objectification theory: Toward understanding women's lived experiences and mental health risks. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 21(2), 173-206.

3. Questionable Assertions about Sexual Behavior and Prostitution

The assertion that sex work is exclusively a dynamic where “the receiver” is paid by “the penetrating male” ignores the diversity of sex work practices and dynamics. Studies show that sex work is not confined to this heteronormative framework, and individuals from various genders engage in sex work for a multitude of reasons, not limited to the financial needs of one party (Weitzer, 2010). This oversimplification of sex work undermines the agency and complexity of individuals involved in such professions.

Reference:

Weitzer, R. (2010). Sex for sale: Prostitution, pornography, and the sex industry. Routledge.

4. Sexual Agency and Gender Stereotypes

The claim that “no one can have an urge to be penetrated by a penis or other object” is an unfounded generalization. Both men and women experience sexual desire and pleasure in a variety of ways, and sexual agency is not limited to one gender. Sexual agency—the ability to make choices about one’s own body and sexual experiences—is recognized as an important aspect of both male and female sexuality. Research on sexual agency highlights that individuals may derive pleasure from various forms of sexual activity, regardless of whether they are the “penetrator” or “receiver” (Bay-Cheng, 2015). This comment, therefore, perpetuates harmful stereotypes that undermine individual sexual agency.

Reference:

Bay-Cheng, L. Y. (2015). The agency line: A neoliberal metric for appraising young women’s sexuality. Sex Roles, 73(7), 279-291.

Conclusion

Your comment(s) appear to reflect outdated and problematic views on gender, sexuality, and sexual desire. It overgeneralizes the biological nature of sex drive, promotes the objectification of women or other receiving partners in sexual interactions, and misrepresents the dynamics of sexual agency and sex work. While it may not fit a narrow definition of "misandrist" (which typically refers to hostility toward men), it certainly exhibits biased and harmful views about gender and sexuality that are inconsistent with modern understandings of sexual diversity and equality.

Full References:

Baumeister, R. F., Catanese, K. R., & Vohs, K. D. (2001). Is there a gender difference in strength of sex drive? Theoretical views, conceptual distinctions, and a review of relevant evidence. Personality and Social Psychology Review, 5(3), 242-273. https://doi.org/10.1207/S15327957PSPR0503_5

Bay-Cheng, L. Y. (2015). The agency line: A neoliberal metric for appraising young women’s sexuality. Sex Roles, 73(7), 279-291. https://doi.org/10.1007/s11199-015-0452-6

Fredrickson, B. L., & Roberts, T.-A. (1997). Objectification theory: Toward understanding women's lived experiences and mental health risks. Psychology of Women Quarterly, 21(2), 173-206. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1471-6402.1997.tb00108.x

Regan, P. C., & Berscheid, E. (1999). Lust: What we know about human sexual desire. Sage Publications.

Weitzer, R. (2010). Sex for sale: Prostitution, pornography, and the sex industry. Routledge.

Jane,

First off, sex is not a biological need but a biological drive. Biological needs are things an organism needs to live (e.g., oxygen, water, food). Sex is not necessary to live.

Second, if the act of sex is exclusively due to a biological drive for males to derive physical pleasure and females to procure protection and resources from a male, how do you explain lesbian couples? Lesbian couples engage in sexual acts, including penetration, though - according to your theory - there is absolutely no biological advantage for them to do so. The only logical conclusion is that females too *gasp* enjoy the act of sex. Not necessarily all of them, but most.

You seem to be on this crusade to convince people (primarily women) that all sex is coercive - a radical feminist myth that has long since been debunked.