No one seems to notice that beliefs about female orgasm are based on pornography - a male masturbation tool. Porn provides male turn-ons, or fantasies, to assist with male arousal in the absence of a partner. Women never comment on these fantasies for a variety of reasons. Either they lack confidence in their own experience, or they are intent on pleasing men or they are making money out of men’s sexual needs. Even sexologists see no difference between reality and fiction. So much for science!
Greetings. I'm an old bloke who is a scientist and former counsellor. My limited understanding of the female orgasm is that it's based upon fantasy which is a fiction. Women can fantasise about people or events they would not actually do in real life. There are definitely opportunities for scientists to measure, think and calculate. I think well-crafted questionnaires would reveal data as to what women think about to achieve orgasm. I was also told that some women don't like to discuss what their fantasies are as it destroys them. Certainly, there is a huge difference between reality and fiction. However, both can be measured and turned into data so lets bring on the science!
Thanks Graham for commenting. Both Kinsey & Hite asked women what they thought of sex and orgasm. But the work of both researchers has been ignored. Even sexologists have fallen back on the myth started by Freud about the vaginal orgasm. Naturally, the G-spot has also been accepted as fact without any evidence for its existence. It would seem that the insistence on intercourse as a means of pleasuring women is aimed at encouraging women to provide the pleasure that men enjoy. Women get other rewards in return from men so they don't seem to complain too much. But I am asking about the science of how orgasm is achieved. Kinsey & Hite were on the right track...
I am man, but why do you call pornography a male tool? Do not women become aroused by watching whatever they crave on display? I am not implying that they are all aroused by what men think they are aroused by.
Could you not ask women you know? Who do you think is responsible for censoring all sexual content in every society? It is certainly not men. Do you provide a strip-tease for your lovers? Does your partner take photos of your genitals for later use during masturbation? I don't know why men don't realise that most women are hugely offended by any questions relating to sex. Try asking your mother or your sister, for example!
Most sex involves removing clothes? I did not say what aroused women, i just wonderered whether it was your view that no form of pornography had any effect on women? I just thought that odd because i know women have sexual urges. But what specifically that arouses them might be different. Of course, then I must ask a woman, which is what i am doing now :) Are all forms of nude depections not enjoyed by women? I am not talking about somebody mailing you dick pics, but a woman acquiring some form of nude depections or film that arouses her sexually. For instance, it is known that women read more romance novels than men? Are none of these books spiced up? And how does this affect sales? And if pornography works for men, that is arouses them sexually, why should they change? The important thing is that they understand that you feel otherwise, is it not? It may not be possible for a man "to change" anymore than it would be for you.
Thanks Michael for commenting. You may have noticed that it is nearly always men (not women) who comment on sexual issues. Yet men do not seem to ever notice that women avoid sexual discussions. Women are certainly not aroused by nudity or genitals in any form. Some claim to be. But women claim many things to do with sex just to please men. Women are not aroused with a lover. Otherwise you (as a lover of women presumably) would be able to explain female erotic turn-ons to me. Male turn-ons are very obvious. Women's are not because they are not aroused as men are by real-world erotic triggers. Responsive women use erotic fantasy when masturbating alone.
Well, I cannot do anything about my gender (at least I do not wish to do anything), nor can force women to discuss sex online. What you say is news to me, this fantasy element, I mean. But is there no form of art that could exploit this? Is it not theoretically possible to produce an expression art that women find arousing?
Anyway, I commented out of curiosity, I do not think i have been rude. I will let others continue. Still, it was interesting. All the best.
Speaking personally, I have only achieved orgasm alone by using an intense focus on erotic fantasy. Sex with a lover in reality does nothing for me. I have concluded that intercourse is arousing from the perspective of the penetrating male. This no doubt explains why most men are not interested in being the receiver in (anal) intercourse. When I masturbate (by pressing down into the internal clitoral organ) I assume the thrusting motion of the penetrating male. My fantasies focus on the perspective of the male penetrating rather than the female as the receiver. Although it feels more like an observer role. Responsiveness is clearly a male characteristic and explains why female orgasm is so rare. Most women do not understand the role of eroticism in sexual response. They have not evolved to be responsive.
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