Soft moderate...

Children are our future assets. We should have to give the first priority for their proper development.

I'm not exactly sure what you mean. Do you mean child rearing & discipline styles? In Western cultures, authoritative child rearing which combines structure with warmth produces the best child outcomes.

Dear Rhianon Allen, your assessment is correct. Thank you so much for participating in this discussion. I mean here the oral dealing or counseling style for child rearing.

Dear Md. Abdur,

You ask the following; "What kind behavior are helpful for growing children: Rigid, soft or moderate?". What do you mean by rigid, soft or moderate behavior? In the psychological domain, which is my area of expertise, we do speak about rigid, soft, or moderate behavior.

I wonder whether you are acquainted with D. Baumrind's work on types of parenting -- authoritative, authoritarian and permissive -- and their respective effects on children's socialization, development and education. Authoritative parents are demanding in intellectual terms, but warm in their social interactions with their children. Authoritarian parents are demanding in intellectual terms, but cold in their social interactions with their children. And permissive parents are guided by, say, the slogan "laissez faire, laissez passer, laissez aller" (i.e., let it go). Research has shown that, contrary to authoritarian and permissive parenting, authoritative parents foster their children's psychological development, be it cognitive, interpersonal, emotional or even prosocial or moral.

Your question also reminds me of the seminal and classical work by M. Hoffman on the discipline strategies -- power assertion, withdraw of love, inductive practices -- parents use to deal with misdeeds of their children. When power assertion is case, parents appeal to their physical or psychological power over resources to deal with their children's misdeeds (e.g., "Robert, if you hurt your sister, then you will not have toys anymore").. When withdraw of love is the case assertion is case, parents use a kind of back maid to deal with their children's misdeeds (e.g., "Robert, if you hurt your sister, then Mom and Dad will not love you anymore"). Parents use inductive practices or strategies to deal with their children's misdeeds by showing them the negative effect of their misdeeds on others (e.g., "Robert, if you hurt your sister, then s/he will be said and unhappy). Research has found that, contrary to power assertion or withdraw of love, inductive strategies are good to foster the several types of psychological development.

I hope that this can be of help to you.

Kind regards,

Olando

Dear Sir, Emeritus Professor Orlando M Lourenço ,

Thank you so much for your insight full discussion. You are correctly said Sir, Really thanks to you and truly it's a great learning for me.

The parents should set clear boundaries for their children clearly delineating what is acceptable behavior and what is not and to define consequences for inappropriate behaviors. They should also provide positive reinforcement for good behaviors so that children learn to associate rewards with good behaviors and sanctions for non-compliance. Both parents should send consistent messages but be flexible to consider circumstances surrounding a behavior.

Dear Sir Srini Vasan ,Thank you so much for your insight full discussion.

Dear Md. Abdur,

Thank you very much for your kind words. It was a pleasure for me to participate in your thread.

Right balance between carrot and stick policy, using more of carrot and stick once in a blue moon.

Dear@ Dr. Rajiv Kumar Gupta, thank you so much for your contribution. I couldn't clear your "carrot and stick policy". Could you clear me it please?

Moderate

Soft moderate...

Per my understanding, the best teachers for children are those who act more as mentors and organizers of learning experiences and situations, such that children came, say, to understand, reinvent and reconstruct everything they learn, than as simple transmitters of ready made and established truths that children have to memorize even without understand them.

Once again, the categories of rigid, soft or moderate behavior were never operationalized in the educational domain. As I see it, the best teachers for aiding children to grow are those who are concerned with both children's cognitive intelligence and emotional intelligence. The former has to do with what I call the three Rs of children's education (i.e. reading, writing, reasoning). The latter has to do with what I call the three Cs of children's education (i.e., care, concern, connection).

Moderation in everything is always good with some differences due to high personal variations. Case by case basis is a good approach.

As you saw above, I recommended Orlando M Lourenco and Srini Vasan. Dr. Diana Baumrind's research was what has documented the effects of the three primary parenting styles that were defined from observations of family interactions. Her later research revealed a fourth parenting style, "Neglect" where the parents were more detached from their child and put their own needs first. The children whose parents used that style were the lowest in social functioning. Authoritative parenting style was observed to have consistently produced the highest social functioning in children. Others have used her typology under different labels: Authoritarian (Autocratic, Drill Sergeant, Brick Wall), Authoritative (Democratic, Consultant, Backbone), Permissive ("Liaise faire," Helicopter, Jellyfish - Indulgent). In summary, constant availability to and monitoring of the child; open, supportive, "soft" communication of consistent boundaries with clearly established rules and consistent follow through with non-violent, logical and natural consequences is what is most effective in parenting.

I did a presentation on "Synergistic Parenting" at the Satir World Conference 2010 in Hong Kong. I am in the process of transferring the power point slides into document form and plan to publish it on ResearchGate soon. I have attached a draft for you, along with my "Synergistic Family Agreement."

Dear Dr. Timothy Bonner , thank you so much for your insightful talks and contribution. I appreciate your sending two attachments.

Thank you so much dear Hassan Izzeddin Sarsak , I think also moderate.

Thank you so much for contributing this thread dear Remi Chukwudi Okeke

Dear Sir Orlando M Lourenço , I always respect and appreciate your insightful talks and you are the esteemed expertise in this field. Truly it's a good learning for me "three Cs of children's education (i.e., care, concern, connection)". May Allah bless all of us.

Soft with taking care of all activities of them

Thank you so much dear M.K. Tripathi , this three things are very important for child caring or education viz care, concern, connection.

Dear Md. Abdur Razzak Choudhury,

Thanks you your kind words. It was me, not our colleague M.K. Tripathi, who referred to the idea that care, concern, connection are important in children's education.

Dear Sir @ Orlando M Lourenço, I know three Cs is your implications and I just gave this example for our colleague M.K. Tripathi. Thank you so much.

Dear Md. Abdur Razzak Choudhury,

Thank you Sir, for the provided clarifications.

Dear Sir @ Orlando M Lourenço, it's my pleasure. Wishes the best.

Three Cs of children's education i.e., care, concern, connection. It's a great learning from Orlando M Lourenço.

Things which interest you.

Dear Dr. @ Zainab Kariam, Thank you so much, actually I follow aforementioned all, sometime soft, sometime moderate or hard. However, three Cs of children's education i.e., care, concern, connection it is a great learning for me from dear Sir @ Orlando M Lourenço. Wishes the best.

Dear Dr Abdur, I agree with your opinion that care, concern and connection are very important for children. You can find our study on parenting discipline styles in Egypt in this link.

https://www.researchgate.net/publication/345244058_Parenting_discipline_styles_and_child_psychopathology_in_a_clinical_sample_of_Egyptian_children_in_the_Nile_Delta_region

Not soft not hard, listen to his opinion & discussed it.

Thanks you for your kind words dear Reham Amer. Glad to receive your important link in this regard. Really thanks to you.

Thanks you so much for your kind words dear Sir Prof. Dr. Raad Sh. Alnayli.

I think we should not be balanced not very and and not too soft. Be good with them as a friend at same time teach them what is wrong and what is right.

Dear Dr. Yashwant Singh Rawal , you have perfectly said not very soft or rigid. However, three Cs of children's education i.e., care, concern, connection it is a great learning for me from dear Sir @ Orlando M Lourenço. Wishes the best.

Moderate is better, with proper care and guidance.

Dear Dr. Isa Baba Koki , I agree with you. However, three Cs of children's education i.e., care, concern, connection it is a great learning for me from dear Sir @ Orlando M Lourenço. Wishes the best. Thanks you so much for your kind contribution in this thread.

Moderate is helping to adopt the environment in educational & employment organization. Which we learnt from childhood.