It’s important to see three points: (1) change is possible; (2) it isn’t his fault that he is the way he is; and (3) there is no better alternative. (Kramer & Dunaway)
I think its important to consider how society (or the symbolic order in Lacanian terms) shapes and colonises men's desire (and what women want too).
Not sure what you mean Pete. Could you be more specific or explicit? Men's desire is definitely focused on obtaining intercourse. Men are aroused by any object, person or thought that involves that objective. Women talk of sexual desire as if it means that they feel sexually desirable to a partner. Researchers (Kaplan & Basson) have defined female sexual desire as receptive. That means that women are receptive to the right man wanting to have intercourse with them - at least in the early days of a relationship.