A BH forms when enough matter is present in a small enough region of space. An event horizon appears around that collection of matter, and information is then prevented from leaving the interior of that horizon (which, for a non-spinning ensemble, is a spherical boundary).
Making a BH is quite hard. Our present understanding requires that beyond a certain mass of neutronium, the nuclear degeneracy is unable to provide support, and so one can add mass without limit - at some point the escape speed exceeds c, and 'Lo', a BH appears.
Two colliding BHs emit gravitational radiation, which couples weakly to matter. There was no effect on the Earth that we might ordinarily notice.
BHs don't absorb 'everything in their way'. They are just masses, like stars or planets. You can orbit them, you can fly by them, they only one-way feature they have is that if you cross the event horizon, there is only one direction: inward.
Coupling of Gravitational Waves with matter is very weak indeed. A supernova explosion in our own galaxy would emit strong gravitational waves. Yet a ring of matter whose radius is 1 km would deform 1/1000 of a Fermi. Note 1 Fermi is 10-13 cm.
An alternative view: Except for their extremely large 3D matter-content, black holes are like any other macro body. They have no mysterious properties.
Black holes are formed, mainly, at the centers of galaxies. During accretion of galactic cloud they acquire spin motion. 3D matter-bodies near central region, on which centrifugal actions are low, assimilate into a single body with extremely large 3D matter-content to form black hole. See: http://vixra.org/abs/1310.0196
Like any other macro bodies, black holes are also under continuous gravitational collapse. Because of this, they continuously radiate corpuscles of radiation (photons) of all frequencies from their region. However, due to very high gravitational attraction between black hole and radiated photons, photons disintegrate before moving far from the black hole and reaching outside observers. See: http://vixra.org/abs/1310.0195
Black holes assimilate other 3D matter-bodies by gravitational attraction. See: 'MATTER (Re-examined)' www.matterdoc.info